The Portal (Home)
Today's Hot Topics
The Boards
Free Registration
Upgrade to Platinum
The Simplest
The Meta
The Simplest Stuff
House & Home
Crafting & Creating
Gardening & Growing
Animals & Pets
Food & Drink
The Simplest Stylist: Fashion & Beauty
The Real World
Finance & Money
Going Green
Employment & Education
The Simplest Living: Organization & Goals
Current Events
Vehicles, Baby
The Arts & Entertainment
Writing & Language
Fine Arts
The Virtual World
The Internet
Gaming, Toys, & Electronics
The Simplest People
Parenting & Pregnancy
Love, Friends, & Relationships
True Confessions
General Advice
The Simplest: Platinum members only
Cheap Therapy
The Lounge
Fitness Support
Chaos Attraction: Improv Lab, Visit 1 — 05.28.2015 by Jennifer
"I'm a Californian! I didn't know we were going to the White House! I would have worn nicer clothes than this!"
Chaos Attraction: Improv 101 Graduation Peformance: Slaughter The Cow — 05.17.2015 by Jennifer
"I probably would have moved on to something with rainbows at that point!"
Chaos Attraction: Improv 101, Week Eight: Choreographed Chaos — 05.13.2015 by Jennifer
"I want you to fail this shit up on Saturday."
Chaos Attraction: A Lot Of People Kinda Hate Mother's Day Too — 05.11.2015 by Jennifer
Yes, that was a bunch of moms saying it. Specifically saying that their moms are unhappy with them no matter what they do, they complain all day, their sons get off the hook while the mothers have to put on Pretty Pretty Princess Day....
Chaos Attraction: Every Year There's Disappointment — 05.11.2015 by Jennifer
Every year I brutally disappoint and fail her, every year we have this fight, every year crying ensues, and I end up leaving angry messages on my shrink's voice mail.
Chaos Attraction: Crazy Drug Stories — 05.8.2015 by Jennifer
And I also found out some super great stories about a now-retired coworker who apparently came into work stoned back in the day. Which led to the remark of "Is that why she kept falling asleep all the time?" As in not only under her desk, but also ON THE TOILET.
Chaos Attraction: An Evening With Dan Savage — 05.7.2015 by Jennifer
And then the Ph.D student finished up by asking for a threesome with Dan and Dan's husband.
Chaos Attraction: Improv 101, Week 7: Kill Butterflies — 05.6.2015 by Jennifer
And when he landed on the other guy's back, I got up the nerve to punch the butterfly in the face. I LOVED THAT. Brian's commentary was that "The way you become unusual in this scene is kill butterflies."
Chaos Attraction: Carnivale Expo Weekend — 05.4.2015 by Jennifer
There were some very cool ladies in there, the sorts of people I wish I could hang out with if our lives ever overlapped. But they don't, so oh well.
Chaos Attraction: Improv 101 Week Six: Knives, Babies, Angry Cats. — 04.29.2015 by Jennifer
"If you're going to shoot somebody, shoot the grounded character."
Chaos Attraction: The Birthday Weekend — 04.29.2015 by Jennifer
It does take place in a bar, and they let the audience walk onstage and order booze. I did that and got whoooooooo drunk just sitting in my seat. (I become a Woo Girl when drunk, apparently.)
Chaos Attraction: Improv 101 Week Five: You Always Edit On Kim Kardashian — 04.22.2015 by Jennifer
Though for once, I'm not super beating myself up about this sort of thing. I'm supposed to suck right now, eh? (P.S. I'm so amused at the coincidence of the post before this one...I swear I didn't notice before posting or writing!)
Megan knows arse-all about.. — 04.21.2015 by blau
(Most frequently quoted bits of Peter’s Friends.) The Kardashians, who are otherwise lacking in myriad important human areas, are bajillionaires on the back (and butt) of that. It’s depressing.
Chaos Attraction: The Douche And I — 04.20.2015 by Jennifer
Anyway, they did some incredibly funny/dirty "I Want" songs, eventually leading to the Frisbee competition where Chad fought off Mother Mary with Frisbees and later Axe body spray.
Chaos Attraction: Who, Me, Bitter? — 04.20.2015 by Jennifer
I'm at a complete loss as to how anyone would call this office expecting that someone here would know about how to do welding.
Megan knows arse-all about.. — 04.16.2015 by blau
(Woo.) There is HUGE value in not doing anything sometimes. But I was doing too much nothing.
Chaos Attraction: Improv 101 Week Four: The Substitute Teacher — 04.15.2015 by Jennifer
"Who's that chicken I want to choke?"
Awfully Chipper: Sixteen to nothing — 04.14.2015 by Maud_Gonne
Dash's team did not win at baseball on Sunday.
Chaos Attraction: The Other Half Of The Show — 04.12.2015 by Jennifer
I have also learned that (a) winkies are BAD, mmkay? and (b) even the younguns don't know what the hell the random emojis mean. "She sent me horse emojis, what does it mean? Does she like me?!"
Chaos Attraction: Two Hits And A Miss — 04.12.2015 by Jennifer
The best part was, well, when a giant piece of foam and the blanket....mate with each other.
Chaos Attraction: Passover With Hippies — 04.11.2015 by Jennifer
Everyone enjoyed the part where we had to dip our fingers in the wine glass and fling out some wine and make sound effects about all the ten plagues. Except at the end he was all, "Oh, wait, the last one was the slaughtering of the first born. Maybe we shouldn't laugh at that."
Still Waters Run No Mills — 04.9.2015 by planetmort
More musings on weight.
Not Travelling At Speed: Co-operation — 04.9.2015 by kju
I had laser surgery performed on my eyes when we were in Kuala Lumpur.
Chaos Attraction: Harold Night — 04.9.2015 by Jennifer
The spaghetti sauce is under the sink in the bathroom in a bag, the toilet brush is in the fridge...later he's a doctor pulling a phone out of someone...
Chaos Attraction: Improv 101 Week Three: The Genitalia Fairy — 04.8.2015 by Jennifer
"If you can outsmart everyone, think of what nobody else is thinking of, then you get to Crazy Town faster."
Chaos Attraction: Relative-Free Easter — 04.6.2015 by Jennifer
And finally, there was a very Leslie Knope skit in which she's giving her boyfriend ten gifts, the first one's a solid gold briefcase, then there's a bust of his head, then Julio Iglesias comes out to sing... Halfway through he's allowed to give his one gift. Which is a card. With a $10 check in it. Cut to her taking back gift #6....
Chaos Attraction: Improv 101 Week Two: The Timeshare Story — 04.1.2015 by Jennifer
they just busted out into skits involving being afraid of invading douchebags (OMG I have cheap beer in the house! Get rid of it!), old ladies, a chick who can hide way too much stolen crap in her vadge, and a lady with a pet worm that she cuts in half when it misbehaves and eats the neighbor's plants.
Chaos Attraction: Mini Maker Faire and Three Acts, Two Dancers, One Radio Host — 04.1.2015 by Jennifer
It has steampunk cars, inflatables, R2D2, Legos, a master's thesis electronic children's book, a drawing machine, awesome automated machines I saw at the state fair, a Lego robot that solved Rubik's cube), a Ukrainian egg demo, and saw my first 3-D printer.
Awfully Chipper: New York weekend — 03.30.2015 by Maud_Gonne
I had nothing to blog about so we went to New York City. The things I do for you people.
Megan knows arse-all about.. — 03.28.2015 by blau
(True stories)
#100BM Day 20
Someone splats a balloon full of purple on my right shoulder. I can’t remember why.
Chaos Attraction: Improv 101 Week One: Sex Chair — 03.25.2015 by Jennifer
Someone in the audience yelled out, "I bought a chair from that store! And then we broke it having sex in it!"
Megan knows arse-all about.. — 03.22.2015 by blau
#100BM Day 14
I was like a wannabe prodigy.
Megan knows arse-all about.. — 03.18.2015 by blau
(Triumvirates.) I totally thought he’d be a White House Spokesman or a senator by now, but I think this situation is probably better
Megan knows arse-all about.. — 03.10.2015 by blau
Sure, it was mostly just 15 minutes of squatting near a weird corporate ornamental fountain frantically trying to get a real 3/4G signal, then obsessively checking my phone for updates for much of the rest of the evening (which, let's face it, I would have done anyway), but boo-urns.
Megan knows arse-all about.. — 03.9.2015 by blau



Felines...nothing more than felines... — 03.9.2015 by FXWizard
Now you can yell at your cats to turn down their crap music; they’ll ignore you just like a REAL teenager, but with less sighing and screaming things like, “YOU’RE NOT MY REAL MOM! I HATE YOU!”
Chaos Attraction: The DUFF: A Movie Review — 02.22.2015 by Jennifer
Anyway, as a teen movie, it's fun. I'm not going to say it totally blew my mind the way that say, Easy A did--it more reminded me of seeing Fifty First Dates.
Chaos Attraction: A Strange Sense Of Optimism — 02.22.2015 by Jennifer
I know, knowing me, that this mental state is unlikely to last past oh.... going back to work. And then I will be in scarcity mindset again. And realistically speaking, I should be planning from a place of loss rather than being all slaphappy...
Chaos Attraction: A Somewhat Spiritual Weekend After All — 02.22.2015 by Jennifer
But this weekend I ended up attempting to stay in the hippie spiritual spirit by going to two spiritual festivals in Sacramento.
Chaos Attraction: Different Ways Of Looking At The World — 02.22.2015 by Jennifer
I can be happy as long as I don't think about how I have to fix my life. How's that?
New York Diaries 1609-2009 featuring Sara Astruc
We'll live like kings! Damn hell ass kings!
Your Hosts
Account Services, Advertising:
Usability Manager:
Design Manager:
Manager at Large:
Chat Manager:
Discussion Leaders: